“Men (people) are rarely aware of the real reasons which motivate their actions.” ― Edward L. Bernays
Imagine this… You are a parent of a beautiful, healthy child. You love this child more than you thought possible. You spent your whole life thinking that you understood the meaning of love until now… Now you KNOW… This is IT. It’s shocking! While you just met this person, this tiny being, you feel they have been with you your whole life. This is love beyond any measure you thought possible, you would do anything.. ANYTHING to protect this person, this part of you. You take your perfect child that you love beyond compare to the doctor who you’ve always been taught is looking out for the health of the people. This doctor will green stamp your little one and ensure that he remains healthy. This larger than life figure with years of education, has dedicated their life to protecting children and you will make the necessary sacrifices to bring your child to this person, as you KNOW they are on your side. You hand your perfect child to this stranger that for some reason you’ve been taught to trust. They take your child and put him on a cold, hard table while the nurse assists in holding down your child, so he cannot move, while she proceeds to inject him with a sharp needle. You are mortified, ‘please, how can you do this to my child.. Can’t you see he’s terrified…’ Oh but the doctor… This trusted employee… This stranger you trust more than yourself, has assured you that this is for the child’s best… It is for the ‘greater good’ of humanity and you reluctantly agree to continue. Then you take your child home while he cries in the car all the way. You bring him to a comfortable spot to nurse him and calm his fears. He has trouble sitting still and won’t calm, he won’t latch to your breast, he seems to have spiked a fever, you give him Tylenol as the doctor prescribed and he falls asleep. When he wakes, you no longer recognize your healthy child. He has stopped talking; he doesn’t look at you; he no longer recognizes his own name.. You call the doctor and scream into the phone ‘what have you done to my child??’ They assure you it is fine and your child was not affected by the vaccines that were given.. ‘No, this wasn’t what you saw.. This thing didn’t happen..’ You believe them and take your child back a few months later and do it again and again and again until your child is completely gone. Nothing of the healthy child you once knew seems to be left. They have been so badly damaged by this thing that is not supposed to cause damage. The doctor still assures you, you have not seen what you saw.. You no longer believe him.
You start to research vaccines and find that this thing that you saw, that your doctor repeatedly denied actually happens all the time; not only that, but this thing that your child was given is filled with toxins and many other things you don’t even recognize. You think that perhaps sacrifices are necessary for the ‘greater good’ just as the doctor has said. You then look further only to find this too, is a lie. These things.. These vaccines that hurt your child weren’t even verified to be effective at preventing disease.. In fact there is no evidence to support they have eradicated disease… So much for the ‘greater good’, huh? You are baffled and wondering how and why did this doctor tell you all these things? Why did you believe him? How did this happen? How did it come to this?
And now your child is left damaged.. Possible irrecoverably.. And for what? You are angry.. So angry you can hardly breathe.. You begin to see it everywhere you go.. All the children that look like your child.. DAMAGED.. All the lies you are told about the ‘greater good’… You begin to question if anything you have been told is true… How can the wool have been so completely pulled over everyone’s eyes.. You try to tell people every chance you get but they won’t listen.. They get angry at you and call you names.. They think you are crazy even when you show them the historical data that vaccines never eradicated disease; Jonas Salk did not cure polio.. ‘please, hear what I’m telling you, our children don’t need to be damaged like this..’ You would think that people would be grateful for this knowledge to protect their children but they don’t appear to be.. You see their children are already damaged too.. One at 12 years old still cannot read, another has multiply chemical sensitivities, another auto-immune, another with uncontrollable seizures and another who has died… You tell them, all of this.. ALL these things can be explained in the vaccine science and we don’t even need them, it’s right in the pharmaceutical company’s own literature.. But no one wants to read what you’ve read and no one wants to hear what you have to say and no one wants to stop vaccinating and you are ostracized.
So as you sit bewildered you ask once again… “How does it come to this? If the data is so clear, why doesn’t anyone know? And why do I feel so alone? I can’t possibly be the only one nor the first to see this, so where is everyone else?”
Enter the propaganda machine and a hidden history….
The Anti-Vaccine Movement: A Hidden History and Propaganda!
Victims of vaccination experience extreme physical and emotional trauma and if that isn’t enough; it appears to be the curse that keeps on giving.. The parent of a child (and ‘yes’ I’m including myself in this) will feel a lifetime of shame and guilt attached to the decision to subject their child to such a ruthless and brutal act that destroys much, if not all of the rest of their lives… And to make matters worse we continually live in a state of an inability to heal from this shame and trauma.. Why? Because the abuser (the vaccine industry) is a malignant narcissist and a narcissist will never apologize, take responsibility or give you closure.. no matter how much you want it.
So first off, let’s define the “Vaccine Industry”… or the Vaccine Industrial Complex… This is an evil empire that includes the pharmaceutical companies WHO make the vaccines, the government that mandates and forces them on us, the pharma funded media that shills its propaganda and lastly their henchmen or the paid and/or unpaid ‘skeptics’ that sing their praises or defile those that don’t.
And now let’s be clear on what I mean, when I state ‘ malignant narcissism’. A certain amount of self-love is healthy and warranted but when the behavior becomes maladaptive it creates shallowness and a regard for oneself to the point of sheer disregard for others… See Dr. Powell’s description here:
Narcissistic Personality Disorder, like all disorders and disease appears to be on the rise. In recent years, we’ve been trained not just to accept but to regard it as a celebrated trait. Remember “Seinfeld” from the 199os? A show about ‘nothing’? But it wasn’t a show about nothing; it was a show about narcissists.. They cared not for deep meaningful relationships, were constantly hot and cold in their romances, easily bored, lacked empathy or any amount of self-reflection. Today this is even more apparent in the show ‘It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia‘, if you look up the word ‘narcissism’ in Wikipedia, you’ll find this show mentioned.. literally. And it’s not just these shows, the list goes on and on.. whether it’s a convention of ‘divas’ or a t-shirt that reads ‘It’s all about me!’… It’s just a never-ending barrage of marveling selfish behavior to the point of nauseum.
If you’ve been following the “vaccine-debate” you can begin to see how the vaccine industry acts as a malignant narcissist. It appears boisterous and overly confident but when you scratch the surface you begin to see through its hollow shell.
It is backed by nothing, no substance, no history…..
Yet despite this, it continues to be the loudest most obnoxious person in the room over and over again repeating the same script, as if it in fact believes its on nonsense.. We’ve all heard the tall tales.. herd immunity, waning immunity, association doesn’t equal causation, just a tiny bit of mercury is okay, etc. etc. To a rationale thinking individual this may seem absurd but to the narcissist this is a common trait sometimes described as magical thinking…
When you love it, admire it and continue providing it with narcissistic supply, it pretends to be your friend but when you begin to question and expose the lies, even in such an innocent manner as to suggest ‘more studies are needed’, it comes down on you like an atomic bomb in an act of narcissistic rage..
It doesn’t play fair, it doesn’t listen to your concerns or even acknowledge them. How many parents of vaccine injured children are told that their child was NOT in fact vaccine damaged, that it was merely their belief but there was no proof of said belief?
It wouldn’t matter to the narcissist whether you had 10,000 citations with medical records, scientific proof, personal video, 100 eye witnesses..
Nothing matters to the narcissist, it will unmercifully embellish, omit, disregard or outright distort facts in order to maintain its facade regardless of what you have proven. And when it can no longer fool others merely with its obnoxious rage, it will gaslight you.. A severe form of mental abuse that works at trying to make you look crazy to others or even at times yourself..
So how is it possible that Senator Dr. Pan and the panel in support of SB277 can appear so unaffected by Karen Kain’s story of her daughter Lorrin? What about the parents of other vaccine injured children, victims of SIDS, autism, seizure disorder, death and so on???
Perhaps the answer to these questions brings us back to empathy… or the lack thereof…
Most of us at one point in our lives find ourselves in an intimate relationship with a narcissist, be them a family member, parent, spouse, lover, friend, co-worker and so on… The more deeply invested and the more you care about the narcissist in your life, the more painful the experience. But to the narcissist a person is no different from any other possession or anything that can provide it with narcissistic supply, be it money, fame, a new car..
So now that we’ve been sufficiently traumatized, abused, verbally assaulted and discarded.. how do we heal? In an effort to heal from a broken relationship, it is natural to want closure.. To want the other party to apologize, admit to their part in the destruction of the relationship but when you’re in a relationship with a narcissist this closure does not come. They aren’t capable of a sincere apology, acceptance of wrong doing and once you’ve been discarded in the relationship, they will not likely even acknowledge your existence..
No matter how much they’ve hurt you…
Since a narcissist is merely a hollow shell without conscience or a soul, it only exists when those around it give it attention, otherwise it will collapse.
As I mentioned in a previous post Vaccine Mandates and Divorcing Our Psychopathic Lover, The State.. There isn’t much more to do at this point but walk away.. We cannot expect acknowledgement or apologies from a narcissist and even if we manage to push back on forced vaccination legislation there will be another and another and another.. When and where will it end?
At the risk of sound too touchy feely.. Healing can and will only come from within us. It will come when we focus on the things and people in our lives that truly matter.. Our relationship with the vaccine industry, malignant narcissist can only exist if we allow it to… This may mean serious adjustments in our lives..
I never thought about emotional trauma in relation to autism until the first time we went to a homeopath. I remember her asking about how I ‘felt’ during pregnancy and how I ‘felt’ about my baby postpartum. I explained the pre-natal and hospital birth trauma though she persisted that there must be something more. Despite her attempt to assure me there would be ‘no judgment’, I remember feeling irritated as if she didn’t believe me when I said that I did in fact feel very bonded to my baby. I felt bonded to him despite the fact that the doctor who delivered him was a monster, despite the fact my pre-natal experience had been unnecessarily physically and emotionally stressful, despite the fact that due to hospital atrocity and incompetence they gave my baby formula, before I was able to breastfeed him and continued to keep him from me for 6 hours… Looking at it with fresh eyes, I can see where she might have thought I would have trouble with the bonding process and I have no doubt given that birthing in America is almost always extremely traumatic, that many women do feel detached.. But I didn’t feel that way at all. I loved Aydan immediately. I always found him delightful. I remember him as a wee little baby before the vaccines robbed him of his potential… when he still felt good in his own skin, when he enjoyed being in and exploring the world. I remember waking early in the morning and how we found it ironic that his initials were A.M. (Aydan Michael), since he seemed to be such an early riser. I would pop in my Mommy and me yoga VHS tape and start my work-out, even if he was still asleep.. Predictably as I turned it on, he would climb out of the bed that we shared and crawl to the next room where I was beginning my stretches.. I can still see his bright smile with big dimples as he rounded the corner, as if to say ‘I’m ready to play…’ I was happy when he woke up. In yoga, I used his body as a weight.. lifting him above my head and resting on my legs. We laughed a lot and had fun!
But lately, I’ve been thinking about the emotional trauma.
By now it is clear that vaccines are a toxic soup that reek havoc on every aspect of our bodies… This is where the DAN (Defeat Autism Now) and most of the natural health community has laid its focus. How to remove the toxins? How to seal the leaky gut? What therapies does the child need? What vitamin deficiencies need addressing? And on and on… But what about the emotional trauma of vaccination?
When my 7 month old daughter meets a new person, even a loving Grandma, she is apprehensive. When Grandma goes to pick her up, she anxiously looks at me on the verge of tears, as if to say ‘mom, is this okay?’ ‘Am I safe?’ I smile at her and assure Grandma’s a good one. After a few loving attempts, she realizes she is safe and the anxiety subsides.. This got me thinking.. I wonder if when in the doctor’s office, did my son, Aydan, look to me as an infant wanting to know the same? Did he look for reassurance, as if to ask ‘Mom, am I safe?’ Did he do this, as I handed him over to this doctor or nurse, who unlike Grandma took him without love into their arms, forcing him down on a table of cold and synthetic material, then proceeded to inject him with a sharp metal object laced with poison? Did he think ‘mom is this okay?’ ‘will I be okay?’ and did I look at him with terror and tears in my eyes, as I always feared the needle… I instinctively understood it was wrong for anything, anyone, under any circumstances to hurt my child.. As I ignored this instinct, could he read it on my face? I know, I told him ‘it would be okay..’ I didn’t mean to lie but deep down, I knew it was wrong.
I also didn’t mean to omit this information when I talked to the homeopath because though our bond may still be strong, our trust had been broken. Over the years since the vaccine assault… The rape that took place before my very eyes.. It has been a barrage of blood tests, urine/stool analysis, enemas, chelation treatments, supplements that didn’t work, MB12 injections… Countless offices with doctors, therapists, institutionalized schools, assessments, people who come and go… cause they aren’t family, they aren’t friends.. they are staff.
So at this time, I’d like to address Aydan, though he may not understand everything I’m about to say, he probably understands more than I know and perhaps someday he will understand it all…
My son I find this letter very difficult to write, as I am about to talk about things that are very uncomfortable for me to admit.
I don’t know if you remember being a baby like your sister but when you were little like her, I took you to a place where people hurt you. They injected you with a sharp object that had stuff inside (poison) and that stuff made you sick. It would change the rest of your life and that is why you have a hard time trying to speak. That is why sometimes you feel confused. That is why you get stomach aches and why your body hurts. I want to make it very clear to you that this didn’t happen because you were bad or because you were different or defective. I allowed this to be done to you because I was ignorant and didn’t trust myself as your mother. I am sorry that I failed to protect you.
I don’t know if you remember the first day of school when you were 3 years old but I remember the first 2 weeks where I walked you to the gate and the teachers took your hand. You looked at me with fear and cried. I know you didn’t want to go and I don’t want you to think that I left you there because I didn’t want to be with you. I left you there because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to help you on my own and I didn’t know where else to turn. I’m sorry that I did that too.
I remember when you were 5 and someone gave you a shirt that said ‘I’m not autistic, I’m autastic!’ You hated that shirt and always wanted to take it off. I recall the day, I put it on you, as you were crying and trying to keep it away.. I looked at you and told you I understood that you hated the shirt and didn’t want to wear it. I said that I would throw it away and you would never have to wear it again. I threw it away in front of you and you seemed happy about it. I want you to know that you were right to hate that shirt. You were right to know that it wasn’t cute or funny.
And Aydan, when you are outside in the world, with all those groups of people or ‘society’ and those people look at you strange or tell you to calm down or be quiet; I hope that you know that this does not mean there is anything wrong with you. The only reason we adults say things like that is because we are ashamed of the fact that we have allowed you and other children like you to be hurt.
As I write this you are 10 years old and though you are a big boy now, I hope it is not too late to re-gain the bond of trust that has been broken between us.
I know that you know, I love you, since I tell you at least 5 times a day and I remember before that sharp needle of poison took your words away, you told me once too.